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Literature Text
Slow he may be, plodding gentle his
tiny legs. Each stick is a new
exploration three steps to
another.
“come on” you shout as he trots over
gravel laughing delighted at the crunch-crunch
beneath his feet
and there
and back again.
A dog bounds by, so much energy that
it sparks fear in the little trekker as
he clings to your leg, begging to be lifted.
Arms wrapped around his world,
he points at the sky, tells you its blue.
Literature
Puppy Love
He never found that one person who cared
and suffered hardships too much to bear.
His Life full of let downs, one after another,
his emotions shut down and quickly smothered.
Always down on his luck, he took all the blows,
he started to think that's just how it goes.
No chance of love, he didn't care to start
and rumours told of his frozen heart.
Then two big brown eyes,
and one cold nose,
it's tail it wagged.
as him it chose.
This faithful friend
came to his side
it warmed his heart,
lit within a fire.
With a playful yelp,
gave one soft paw.
His heart of ice
began to thaw.
Two lost souls found love to share,
so for a puppy's love just bew
Literature
My Sweet Child
My sweet child,
Don’t grow up too fast
Live your life in brilliant smiles
I promise the pain you feel isn't made to last
My dearest darling,
Don’t surrender to wishing your life away
There is so much in this world that you aren't seeing
Your journey has barely begun, don’t find yourself lead astray
My beautiful angel,
Today you have finally come of age
You have grown, though you are not yet far from your cradle
Keep both triumphs and lessons close to your heart as you dance across your page
My gentle daughter,
You have become an admired woman
There is a man who fills you with love and laughter
My greatest dreams for you
Literature
Puppy Love (Kisses Make People Feel Better)
Puppy Love (Kisses Make People Feel Better)
i was the shortest boy in class at 6,
nicknamed ricky a or “ricky 1”
because i told the other ricky in class
that i was number one.
ricky p or ricky 2 scoffed at my reason
but he didn’t understand how cool i was.
and that’s fine, i knew i was the best.
momma always taught me that
‘cause our last names started with ‘a.’
so we had to bring our a-game
and bring home a-grades.
and let’s just say,
my very first day was memorable.
after i explained to the second ricky
why i was number one,
we had to cut out shapes
for our new cubbies.
where crayon staine
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tiganusi reminded me in the lit forum that the reason I probably wasn't writing because I have a child. So why not write about the thing stopping you writing and creating some weird poetry paradox but at least actually writing.
Just throwing up something that probably needs mega edits later.
Just throwing up something that probably needs mega edits later.
© 2015 - 2024 BeccaJS
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Overall Vision
Originality
Technique ImpactHaving three siblings and three nephews, this one really hit home for me. You managed to convey, in such short space, the various actions and feelings of your typical toddler. In just a brief moment, he's capable of going from happy to scared and then switching to curiosity. Kids have a crazy tendency to do that, and you portrayed just how sudden it can be quite well. Kids are fast, slow, happy, sad, curious, and any other trait possible; you show that perfectly.
Really, the only fault I can find with this poem is the length. While you did well with what you have, I think this idea could've been expanded upon. Maybe the child sees clouds in various shapes, or he comes to find the dog a fun animal to be around. Maybe he almost wanders into the street and has his first real run-in with any kind of danger. Then again, what you already have displays the innocence of childhood and what kids are like very well. I could see a little kid doing every little thing you described. ^-^